Me Me Me

Not only is my darling husband the most intelligent person I ever met, he is also generous and open when it comes to other people. Last night, I was pontificating on one of my usual themes — that the vast majority of people, particularly middle-aged men, are basically boring — and he respectfully disagreed. “I can find something interesting in anyone,” he declared. “I just get them to talk about themselves.”

Um, okay, I am an interviewer. (See my Q&A article archive.) Getting people to talk about themselves is what I do as a profession, and it’s my job to make them seem interesting. But most of the people I interview are creative types, and I’ve done a lot of homework before I embark on a very structured conversation. If an actor starts boring me, I quickly change tacks. Darling husband is gifted at this in everyday life, which makes him an outstanding dinner partner whether he’s sitting next to a trophy wife or a bureaucrat.

I can schmooze pretty well, but the older I get, the more it takes out of me. I could never be a socialite (beyond the obvious obstacles of money and breeding) because the small talk at black-tie events would kill me. Luckily, I have surrounded myself with friends who are lively and fun, and my darling husband is always interesting; it’s strangers and random acquaintances who are the problem. So the question remains: Are most people interesting or boring?