Me Me Me

I maintained my love for Bill Clinton about a decade longer than I should have, in spite of the fact that his silly dalliance probably cost Gore the presidency. Oh man, I was spinning through the ceiling with excitement in the summer of 1992 when he picked Gore as his running mate and they climbed on that bus with Hillary and Tipper. Two charismatic (yes, Gore can be charismatic), super-smart Democratic sons of the South? It was almost too wonderful to process. With a little help from Ross Perot, Poppy and Barb got sent back to Kennebunkport. That seems like a lifetime ago now.

Okay, fast forward as Bill and Hillary behave abominably during the primaries. They’re a competitive twosome — we know that — and she expected to get the nomination handed to her (NOT). Faced with defeat, they managed to get through the convention without lobbing any grenades, but since then? The Obama people must be as nervous as an Auburn fan in the fourth quarter of the Alabama game.

Bill shows up this morning on the Today show to tout his global initiative, or whatever. Closet Republican Matt Lauer asks him if he thinks the first presidential debate should be cancelled. This is an eeeaasy question. What does Bill say? Gee, he doesn’t have an opinion, but helpfully adds that McCain had originally asked for MORE debates, so he’s obviously not reluctant to face Obama.

WRONG! Here’s the answer: “It would send a terrible message to the American people to cancel the first presidential debate. If Senator McCain feels he’s too busy getting briefed on what mortgage-backed securities are, just MOVE the debate to Washington rather than flying down to Ole Miss.” Bill couldn’t muster a statesman-like response that also happens to be true AND helpful to Obama. No wonder I find myself avoiding the media entirely! I feel like I’m living in an alternate universe.

I have spent too much time this week contemplating the absolute ridiculousness of Sarah Palin as a Vice Presidential nominee — and the sorry spectacle of a hall filled with Republicans cheering a woman who favors book-banning, teaching “intelligent design” and having her state secede from the union. Never mind how her abstinence campaign turned out! Can anybody imagine what the Fox newshounds would have said if Karinna Gore had shown up (secretly!) pregnant at the Democratic convention in 1992? Thank goodness Bristol has Jamie Lynn Spears to turn to as a role model!

The mayor of Wasilla, Alaska, who just got a passport a couple of years ago, is supposedly the most qualified person to be second in command to a 71-year-old with a health file as thick as a novel? It’s insulting to every woman in America to suggest such a thing. With the exception of Nancy Pelosi, the state of women in politics is pretty darn disheartening. Forget Hillary: The playing field was never even for her, and the first woman President doesn’t need to wake up next to somebody who already had the job — and wishes he still did.

As for political spouses, nobody could top Michelle Obama for class and smarts (with the possible exception of poor Elizabeth Edwards), and yet Americans “can’t warm up” to Michelle. Ay yi yi! Meanwhile, men like Edwards and that egomaniac Eliot Spitzer make all politicians seem like losers. If I had the talent, I’d write a solo stage show from Silda’s point of view. Just like Elizabeth, this super-smart lawyer basically gave up her career to keep her family going. And where did it get her?  

After Gore lost to Bush (correction: after the Presidency was stolen), I swore I would not let my heart be broken by politics again, but this election will be a huge test of America’s sanity. I just wish Obama’s mother was still alive and on the stump with her visionary son and the other three women in his life.